Having a relationship might one of the hardest things there is. This is even more difficult if you’re in your 20s. Couples still have a long list of mistakes they must go through before they learn key lessons to getting and maintaining a great relationship。
谈恋爱可能上世界上最有难度的事情之一,对20多岁的年轻人来说,尤其如此。情侣之间要在经历种种磨砺之后,才能掌握获得和维系稳定和谐恋爱关系的法宝。
Here are some things you should keep in mind if you plan on having a relationship in your 20s.Recommend For You
如果你计划在20多岁时谈一场恋爱,那就好好读读下面几条建议吧。
1. Make Time for a “Date Night”
为“约会之夜”抽出时间
Young couples are constantly going out, spending time with friends, working, or going to school. In order to show one another how much you care, it’s a very good idea to plan a date night, even if it’s just once a month。
年轻情侣总是忙忙碌碌,不是和朋友聚会,就是工作,要么上学。为了向对方表示关切,“约会之夜” 是个很不错的主意,哪怕一个月只有一次也好。
Take turns picking the restaurant, or even prepare a romantic dinner at home. Make sure your cellphone is off and you’re as mindful as possible。
轮流选餐馆,或者准备一顿浪漫的家庭晚餐。关掉手机,尽量不要分心。
2. Take Turns Paying for Dinner
轮流付帐
The days where the man pays for everything are gone. It’s okay to take turns paying for whatever it is that you do. Whether one pays for the dinner and the other the movie, it doesn’t matter. You’re both young, just starting out, and this will help keep your relationship balanced。
男人是钱包的理念已不时尚。不论做什么,最好轮流付帐。一个请吃饭,另一个请电影,谁先谁后都无所谓。你们还年轻,生活刚刚开始,这样做将有助于保持恋爱关系的平衡。
3. Set Honest Expectations
明确期望值
The most important rule when it comes to any kind of dating is to be clear what your expectations are with the relationship. If you see it lasting for the long run, then make sure that your partner knows that. In other hand, if you’re looking for someone just to have sex, then say that as well。
就各种约会而言,最重要的一条是,明确你期望从关系中得到什么。如果你希望长期相处,让对方明白。另一方面,如果你只是在寻找“炮友” ,也要坦诚说明。
Believe me, being honest with what you expect will show that you’re confident and will earn you a lot of respect from your partner. Don’t disregard this。
相信我,诚实讲出你的期望不仅可以显示出你的自信,还能赢得对方的尊重。不要忽略这一点。
4. You Can Still Have Friends
你仍然可以有朋友
It’s very important to not exclude yourself from your social circle to hang out with your partner 24/7. This person isn’t the only thing that’s important in your life. You still have other people who want to spend time with you. Be sure to keep up with your friends and do fun things together. You need to give each other space to keep the relationship fresh。
不要脱离社交圈,时时刻刻与恋爱泡在一起,这一点很重要。这个人不是你生活的唯一,还有其他人希望与你共度时光。一定要与朋友保持联系,一起做些有趣的事。你需要给对方留出空间,以保持新鲜感。
5. Nagging Isn’t Cool
唠唠哪叨要不得
Your partner will do things that piss you off. Don’t nag. This is immature and you will lose your partner’s respect for doing it. Calmly discuss your opinion and why you feel the way you do。
如果对方做一些惹你生气的事情,千万别唠叨。唠叨是不成熟的表现,你会因此失去对方的尊重。心平气和地讲出你的想法,并说明理由。
6. Keep Your Relationship Semi-Private
保持恋爱关系半私密化
It’s ok to post a couple of cute pictures here and there on Instagram and Facebook, but the reality is that people really don’t want to see pictures of you kissing multiple times per day。
在Instagram 和Facebook 各处晒几张你们可爱的照片,人们有兴趣欣赏,但如果每天在屏幕上频繁看到你们亲吻的照片,人们会生厌。
Avoid posting pics on Facebook every time you kiss, or Tweeting about your plans every other minute. While people may be happy about your relationship, they don’t want to hear about it 24/7.
不要每次都把亲吻的照片都放到Facebook上,也不要每次有什么计划就发推。尽管人们可能因你开始恋爱了而感到高兴,但他们不希望一天到晚全是这件事。
7. Be Yourself & Let Your Partner Do The Same
做自己,也给对方做自己的机会
One of the key aspects of every relationship is letting yourself and your special someone be themselves. You were attracted to this person for a reason, and there’s no need to try and change them。
恋爱中关键的一点是,让自己和你的那个她(他)做自己。你被对方吸引不无缘由,没必要下功夫去改变他们。
Likewise, don’t let someone try to change you. You are who you are, and if that’s not good enough for either of you, then this isn’t really a relationship that’s going to work。
同样,不要让对方改变你,你就是你,如果互相觉得不适合,那不如趁早散伙。
8. Be Adventurous & Enjoy Your Time Together
敢于尝试,并一起享受生活
This is another one that’s very important. Remember that you’re still in your 20s and you should be having as much fun as possible。
这也是很重要的一点。你们才20多岁,应该尽情地享受生活。
Set aside time to do both of your favorite activities and hobbies. Be adventurous and try something new that you’ve both never done before. Don’t take yourself that seriously. Make jokes and laugh about anything and everything。
为喜爱的活动与爱好留出时间。敢于冒险,尝试新事物。别太把自己太当回事,说说笑话,尽情欢笑。
9. Communication is Important
交流亦重要
Every relationship expert will emphasize the importance of communication in a long-lasting relationship. Each night, talk about your day, your concerns, your thoughts, and your dreams with one another. As the other person is talking, be sure to listen attentively, and communicate your interests and feelings。
恋爱专家都强调交流在持久恋爱过程中的重要性。晚上,一起聊聊白天的工作、关心的事情、想法和梦想。当对方讲述时,用心倾听,了解对方的兴趣和感受。
10. Trust, But Without Being Naive
信任,但不抱幻想
Trust is important. It’s the backbone of all relationships, especially those in your 20s. Avoid hacking your loved one’s cell phone, computer, and emails. This isn’t going to solve anything。
信任很重要,它是各种关系的基石,尤其对20多岁的年轻人来说。不要窥探爱人的手机、电脑和邮件。这解决不了问题。
When situations arise, trust only reliable sources, such as those who aren’t trying to sabotage your relationship. On the flip side, don’t be naive about the situation either。
有疑问时,只依赖可靠信息源,例如那些没有破坏你恋爱关系企图的人。如果确有情况,也不要抱有天真幻想。
You both deserve to be happy, and if things don’t work out, as they say, there are other fish in the sea。
你们两人都应该快乐,如果恋爱不成功,记住人们常说的那句话,天涯何处无芳草。
Following these simple relationship rules—if you’re meant to be together—is truly the way to make your relationship work, and last a lifetime。
如果你们注定在一起,遵循这些简单的恋爱准则毫无疑问会促进你们的关系,并让你受益终生。