Despite the fact that we’ve just hadChristmas and New Year, the world decided that some of us needed yet another reminder of how sad and alone we are. Enter Valentine’s Day, a faux semi-holiday that was invented to stimulate the sales of the floral, jewelry, chocolate and suicide hotline industries. In case you find yourself partner-free this February 14th, here is some proof that you can totally rock the day, singles style。
1. Party
Why sit around wallowing in self pity when you can be out having a good time. If you’re invited to a V-Day party, go. Who cares if it’s going to mostly be couples. You get the chance to drink and eat on somebody else’s dime while observing things going on around you. Perhaps there’ll be some hotties there, or maybe just couples pretending not to be in a fight over inadequate Valentines gifts. Either way, there will be good times! Alternatively, you can throw your own party with an appropriate theme such as “historical couples” or “horror movie characters。”
2. Treat Yourself
The upside to not having a valentine is not being obliged to spend of your pay check on a gift for someone. Instead, I recommend that you:
We can sometimes put so much time and energy into other people that we forget about ourselves. So why not make this Valentine’s Day all about you? Whether your idea of indulgence is a massage, a new game or an entire pot pie to yourself, do it. Frankly, I’d go for all three。
3. Have an Awesome Night Out
Just because it’s Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean you’re forbidden to go out on the town. I say take it back. Grab some friends and tear it up over some drinks and great food. I’m not even going to advocate the idea that you might meet somebody while out, because that shouldn’t be your focus. If it happens, great, but don’t go into the night with that expectation. Just have fun。
4. Have an Awesome Night In
Why does everyone seem to think that staying in is so lame? I honestly think that rocking V-Day from he lounge room could be amazing. Order in from your favorite takeout, get a bottle of something delicious and fire up the old blu-ray player。
5. Spread the Non-Romantic Love
Not in a venereal disease type of way。
Just because you don’t have a romantic partner this Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean there isn’t at least one “special someone” in your life. I’m talking about friends and family, and they deserve love too. Send some flowers to your mum, treat your dad to a nice bottle of scotch, or send some nice and/or purposely terrible cards to your friends。
6. GTFO
Why not take the opportunity to get out and do something you wouldn’t usually do. Whether it be a local game or exhibit, or even an overnight stay somewhere, take the opportunity to break your normal routine and GTFO。
7. Secret Santa—Valentines Style
Yeah, I’m making it a thing. Let’s call it Secret Casanova, because why not? Gather a group of friends together, draw names and then buy a nice gift for your chosen person. Alternatively, you can purposely buy crappy or funny gifts just for the fun of it. In that case, I recommend naming the game Sloppy Casanova。
8. Volunteer
Nothing will make you forget the heinous commercialism of Valentine’s Day more than doing volunteer work. You’ll quickly realize that while the rest of the Western world is wondering how big a bouquet should be, some people have bigger things to worry about, like food and shelter. Get some perspective。
9. Watch Valentine’s Day
This movie is so bad that watching it will make you glad you’re not getting involved in this pre-determined day of love. It may also make you vomit it a bit。
10. Business as Usual
If nothing else on this list inspires you, I recommend simply doing nothing. Stop the day from having any power over you by treating it like any other. It may be slightly difficult to ignore the red and pink floral explosions throughout the office, but you don’t have to let that make you act any differently. Flip Valentine’s Day the bird and move on. If it makes you feel any better, you’re probably happier than the woman in the next cubicle over whose boyfriend didn’t get her anything because he forgot/”doesn’t believe in it”/is too busy with his mistress.
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尽管我们刚过了圣诞节和新年,另外一个节日又要提醒我们多么孤独悲伤。那就是情人节,人们设立了这个半假日来增加鲜花、珠宝、巧克力的销售,自杀热线产业也更为火爆。如果你发现没有人陪你度过2月14日这一天,通过以下单身者的方式你也可以过得很嗨。
1.聚会
既然能外出度过一个好时光,又何必闲坐着自我怜悯呢。如果有人邀请你去参加情人节聚会,那就去吧。谁在乎是不是大部分人都和情人一起去的呢。你有机会在别处吃喝,观察着周围的事情。也许会有些美女,也许有些夫妻假装着并没有因为情人节礼物不合适而争吵。不管怎样,你会过得很开心的!你也可以给自己的聚会一个合适的主题,如“历史夫妻”、“恐怖电影人物”。
2. 款待自己
没有情人的好处就是不必为别人花钱买礼物。于是,我建议你:款待自己。有时候我们花很多时间和精力在别人身上而忘了自己。那么何不为自己过这个情人节呢?不管你觉得按摩、玩新游戏还是吃一整个馅饼是一种享受,选你喜欢的去做吧。说实话,这三个我都会去做。
3. 出去过一个愉快的晚上
情人节并不意味着你在小镇里不能外出。找几个朋友去喝点酒,吃点大餐。我并不赞成你外出时会遇到喜欢的人这种观点,这不应该是你关注的重心。如果你真的遇到喜欢的人,那很好,但不要带着这种期待外出。只要玩得高兴就行。
4. 在家过一个愉快的晚上
为什么似乎所有人都觉得待在家里很无聊呢?说实话,我觉得在自己的客厅里过情人节会好得惊人。从你最喜欢的外卖店叫个外卖,喝瓶可口的饮料,打开古老的蓝光播放器。
5. 传递非浪漫的爱
并不是传播性病。
这个情人节你没有一个浪漫的情人并不意味着你的生命中没有一个“特殊的人”。我说的是你的朋友和家人,他们也需要爱。给你妈妈寄一些花,请你爸爸喝瓶苏格兰威士忌,或者给你的朋友寄一些漂亮的和/或故意恶搞的卡片。
6. 外出
何不借此机会出去做些你通常不会做的事情呢。不管是玩本地游戏、参加展览会或者在其他地方过夜,你可以借此机会打破常规,出去做些事情。
7. 神秘圣诞老人——情人风格
是的,这就是我要说的。我们称情人节为神秘卡萨诺瓦吧,因为为什么不这样叫呢?和几个朋友一起玩抽名字吧,给你抽到的那个人买个漂亮的礼物。或者你也可以故意买差劲的或搞笑的礼物,只是为了取乐。如果是那样,我建议把这个游戏命名为粗心的卡萨诺瓦。
8. 志愿者
没有什么能比做志愿者工作更能使你忘记情人节可恶的商业主义。你很快就会意识到当西方世界中的人们在想一个花束应该多大时,有些人还在担心更重要的事情,如食物和住所。了解一下这些方面吧。
9. 看电影《情人节》
这个电影很糟糕,看这个电影会使你庆幸自己不用过这个固定的表达爱意的节日。这个电影还有可能使你吐槽一番。
10. 照常工作
如果你不喜欢上述的几种方式,我建议你什么都不要做了。像往常一样对待这一天,这一天就不会对你有什么影响。可能要忽略办公室各处红色和粉色的鲜花略微有些困难,但你不必让这影响你的行为。忘掉情人节,做你自己的事。如果这使你感觉好些的话,你可能比下一个隔间的女人更快乐,她的男朋友什么也没给她买,可能是因为他忘了,或他不相信情人节,或忙着照顾自己的情妇呢。